• This is my entry for the Mark Warner Holidays’ Family Ambassador Programme •
Whenever the conversation turns to holidays, you can always bank on somebody to recommend Mark Warner and honestly, I’m not exaggerating when I say that I’ve never heard a negative word about them.
Lily hasn’t been abroad yet and we’re itching to take her away for some sunshine and fun.
With six summer holiday resorts across Greece, Sardinia and Corsica, Mark Warner certainly have a lot to offer and, fingers crossed, we’ll have our own signature #MWMoment before the end of the year.
With that in mind, I’ve put together a list 0f 10 travel essentials that we’d like to take on holiday but with a little twist as they’re all completely imaginary. Oh how we wish they were real though, don’t you agree?
Here’s my ideas and prototypes for the next generation of travel products but no stealing, I’ve got patents pending!
(1) MAGICAL SPACE-SAVING LUGGAGE
Forget packing lists and the frustration of having to choose which dresses and shoes to pack, just chuck them all in without a second thought and enjoy your holiday!
No extra baggage charges, no broken back (I’ve made it weightless, thank me later) and no holding off for the ‘perfect’ souvenir, have them all, every tacky magnet, every box of shells, they’re all yours.
There is a little catch in that it’d have to be magical and I’m no fairy godmother but hey, I’ll just ring up Mary Poppins and ask her to share her secrets, I’m sure it’ll be fine *looks shifty*
(2) SUN CREAM PILLS
Day #2 of your holiday and you’re already showing off the burnt lobster look. Goodbye sassy holiday snaps, hello aftersun.
Sounds familiar? Well not anymore, take a pill and bask in the sun until it sets!
(3) ANTI-DROWN SWIM WEAR
As my daughter keeps reminding me, “Mummy I can’t swim.” She can actually (well, sort of) but if you’re not overly confident you no longer have to hang around the shallow end like a wally or avoid the water altogether as I’ve got something for you! Enter my ‘anti-drown swim wear’ – it inflates when you’re in trouble and activates its own built-in panic button. Clever ey?
The stylish savvy amongst you will notice it comes in a dashing yellow colour with added beading. Vogue have been on the blower, we’re in discussions. Watch this space!
(4) TRANSLATION CHIP
Worried the locals are making fun of your slight bald patch? Get wise to their game with my handy translation chip. Simply have some very minor, absolutely non-invasive surgery before your flights and you’ll be fluent in the language of your choice. Hurrah!
(5) SELF-DRYING TOWEL
Bring one towel for all of the family with my amazing self-drying towel. Dries itself within seconds no matter how wet it is. How, I hear you ask? *cough* I’ve not thought of that yet, shall we move on?
(6) ‘SOBER-UP’ CHEWING GUM
Too sozzled to find your room? Need to pick the kids up but you’ve forgotten their names? Sober up instantly with my new ‘sober up’ chewing gum. Also eliminates hangovers!
(7) CONTACT LENS CAMERA
Forget lugging around your camera and only sharing your poor quality phone photos on Instagram.
Pop in these scratch-free contact lenses and take ultra HD 24 mega pixel photos in the blink of an eye (literally).
Then use the built-in wireless technology to port over to your smartphone and viola, your hotdog legs are free to take pride of place on your feeds.
(8) ANTI-SICKNESS CHOCOLATE
No more holiday-related funny tummy or travel sickness and a guilt-free reason to eat chocolate – “It’s for medical reasons, honest!” I think I’m on to a winner here, right?
(9) THE ‘FEEL AT HOME’ DIGITAL SCREEN
Is your kid being awkward and moaning about how they’re homesick and can only sleep in their own room?
I’ve got you covered with the ‘feel at home’ digital screen. Throw it over their bed (it’s breathable, probably…) and it’ll display scenes from their bedroom to make them feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Ahhh!
(10) DIGITAL PASSPORT
I’m stumped as to why these don’t exist already actually. Hello government, we’re in the digital age now? *waves*
No more losing the bloody thing or getting to the airport and scrambling around your hand luggage with an angry queue behind you, simply do your cheesiest grin and hold up your smartphone, easy as pie.
So, what do you think? I am on the right tracks? Do you have anything to add?
Have you ever been away with Mark Warner? If so, please share your photographs and experiences in the comments below or over on social media so I can get all giddy inside and cross everything I have that they’ll find my entry endearing and/or entertaining *flutters eyelashes*
Do you have a favourite from the list? (I’m totally not judging if it’s the ‘sober up’ chewing gum!)